i was trying to blog this entire day. however, one thing lead to the next, and it has been quite an eventful, albeit probably boring day for the most of u, since i barely ventured out except to get dinner. but it was a good day nonetheless, filled with something other than games for once, and other than books.

for the more obeservant souls out there, and for the really blind ones, yes i have changed my blog drastically. taken from blogskins.com, with the designer being credited to your right, but definitely the picture is taken by someone familiar to ayumi fans, i was still experimenting with blog skins and so on, and stumbled upon hers. needless to say, pink, ayumi, more pink... nothing more that i really want. a few more experiments on turtlepowah.blogspot.com, which is my test blog, i figured out how to put this out. BUT... firstly, she lacked the links to archives, history, whatever, secondly, my comments disappeared. but i guess i understood that, since most of her friends uses something called a tag board... which i shall desist from using. not coz it's not great, but -.-" it looks damn messy.

there were a couple of other stuff too, so remembering deeply that i havent touch html or anything related for about 2-4 years, this was something i can barely take on to change. but i had to have my archives back at least, then worry about comments at a later stage or something. starting a test blog to find out what was wrong, i managed to put everything back except comments. jake came on and HEROICALLY solved the rest, which he said was T_T some terrible layering stuff (i have no idea what he is talking about, really :o) but for someone who's still around 7th-8th grade, this isnt such a bad html practise, so i wont comment too much, other than her various works for her friends T_T they are all so small, though, nice. but for someone like me who likes to type out titanic length blogs, it is never going to work out.

so for this new lay out and songs and so on, props to rachelle, whoever she is, and my dearrrrrr jake :D :D

mean while, i been trying to clear my room and so on, and wasn't really successful at it because i get so distracted by the stuff i own. eventually...i managed to start tidying up my bed. it wouldnt have been anything eventful except... I GOT FARKEN LOST IN MY SHEETS -.- i pulled my blanket out of the cover because it was getting so lopsided from all my rolling around. then.. because the cover was so huge, the other reason why it was getting lopsided... i had to go in and adjust the blankie and so on. next thing i know, i lost my sense of direction and had seriously NO idea where i came in from... i was almost guna start wailing for linx to help when i saw a patch of light... and crawled towards it. end of ordeal.. phew!

and, being a sunday, it was time to treat myself to something special again! i believe to live life to the fullest, to be able to love someone else, to give whole heartedly, u gotta damn love urself first, and look after yourself. so saying, i been treating myself every sunday of the year, or whenever i feel like it. but sundays are... a must! todays treat was a strawberry bath... and i just lounge in there for 2 hrs, till my skin almost wanted to give way :P and i was reading my text, getting it wet... sleeping... all nice and warm and stuff. then i walked out, smelling of flowers, strawberries and vanilla, a grand mixture of airfreshener, shampoo and of coz, the bath suds. dont everyone wana smell sooo good eh?

anyways, the cleaning up of the bed was mainly for the photoshoot :o
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can u spot the newbies on my bed? :D they are sooo cutieeee :D :D

aside from that, i got fairly annoyed at our balcony, coz i could only see half the view out there since the silly blinds kinda broke. i got annoyed enough to use the broken strings and tie them up to the top. so now, it looks like this

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if u dont like it, too bad, i happen to love it. sorry about the dirty pooh bath mat tho, i decided its high time i air it... considering all the candle wax i been dropping on it, the amount of bath suds that its got on it, it deserve a little of the happy sun that we all have come to take for granted.

for people who are used to big pictures or who liked my huge pictures posted before, with the present layout i am afraid i can't accomdate ur pleasure, so if u still like huge pictures or just want a clearer view, click on the thumbs, i am sure image shack wudn't mind so bad.

now for the others that i have been talking to, or who have been reading my blog, the poor girl who's boyfriend broke up with her just before he proposed? remember her? her blog no longer exists. as in the site itself. now i have heard a couple of comparisons since i told some friends, that perhaps like me she has moved on, and that she just wanted to delete all her posts the easier way. perhaps, and i would be glad that she has moved on, wallowing and allowing yourself to be hurt is one of the worse thing u can do to urself. someone fucked u up, let urself weep what u need to, it's human, then move on. true it is easier said than done, but i am not sure wailing on a daily basis, tearing urself up from inside out is exactly a good thing too.

but what happened to me was, i just like to sit there in self pity. it feels good to be there because there are people who be like "awwww" and then i feel so loved. but then something snapped in me and i decided i prefer to be the bitch, and just ignore the past. the past wasn't just boyfriends anyways, it was family, it was friends. oh yer, the ones that hurt u the most are always the ones u care for the most. and i didnt delete my entire blog site, i just decided i love the title too much, ghost elf in german, why the hell would i give up that coz of the few people who fucked up my life? and because i allow myself to wallow in self pity and such, i also allowed them to continue screwing with me long after some of them are gone, and definitely long after they care.

so here it is, my blog spot stays, and i am trying to make it better because damn, it's hawt.

it's not exactly a fansite btw, *shudders*, while it has a HUGE ayumi thingy at the top, and for now i have linked a never ever.midi file as a looping midi to this site (i HATE midis, when i do bother to get a proper ftp, i will link it to the actual song, which is SO much better...), it is still a site dedicated to me, the crazy thoughts of mine and various things i had like to share.i am not sure i wana pay 5usd a mth for a ftp just for a blog to make it prettier, because this is still just a place i like to talk randomly in. worse come to worse, if it doesnt run well and i run out of fresh songs to fill it up, i am just guna cut the songs. doesn't hurt anyone.

to stop it, just click stop at the top.

someone asked me to post my pict as well just now. i did thought of doing that. then, considering my friends' sanity, i decided against it. i am going to use this blog to say lotsa stuff, in the mean time, people who knows me might not want to be recognised next to this crazy woman... or related to me at any rate in case.. i sound retarded on my blogs. till i find a safe way to post my picts without my friends being considered as insane without their permission too, i will reconsider that notion :D

meanwhile, for the few funny people out there who wana see my 3g ipod, here it is, first with the pink sox i bought for it, then without, in all its white pure goodness :D.

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i love my ipod~

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