ok... this has officially moved. you'll be re-directed in 5 seconds or less (coz i am inept..) if your browser hates you, click here...



well. i haven't been posting! haven't you noticed!

the website went down for 18 hours yesterday while jake and i were moving the data from blogger to my new site. most of it is already up and going.

the new site's at http://www.ghostelf.com. we are still in the process of tweaking it, but most of what's supposed to be functional is already working.

in a few hours i will set this to auto re-direct you to the new page once jake is more or less ready for me to allow re-directs.

^_^ have fun and update ur links/favourites and what nots ^_^



Song i am listening to : none, watching Konjiki no Gash Bell
Mood : satisfied

one of my blog-and-news browsing in the last few hours (i made full use of my awasu rss feed, wahaha) lead me to this site, called the live 8. please sign the campaign to end extreme poverty. they don't need your money, they want your voice, one by one, to sign up, and end extreme poverty for the world and the world's children. right now, worldwide, concerts are going on to raise awareness as well as to appeal to the leaders going for the g8 summit to make provisions to end the world's poverty.

countries rich in resources are also the very same few who have the most extreme form of poverty in the world. yet the countries that are buying these resources off them seems perfectly well off, infact very well off. if everyone contributes to help the poor ones out, wouldn't there be no more poverty?

The past few hours were spent, reading whatever i can lay my hands on and watching Gash, an anime that jason, my friend back home in singapore, once showed me but i have never managed to find on the network back on campus.

i try to space my anime out abit now, due in part to the fact that i don't like parting with the characters i just met... so soon. Like how i take my novels and what not, i do not enjoy "losing" them the moment that i just "met" them. sounds queer i know, but remember the last good book that you read? and how you wish it would never end?


then i popped by my haloscan comment controls just for a while, and got a new comment from a person's blog i have been lurking for a while. wow. lol. i never realised people could find out where they get linked back from on some kind of control panel or something. found out from another friend later on that you could just ask for statistics from your web host or something, and then it would all be revealed unto you.

i lurk alot on many blogs, many different pages, for the sheer joy of reading. i love to read stuff that isn't too... theoretical. much as i enjoy studying, i don't exactly like what i read all the time. alot of them would make sense only if, say, i am in that situation.

not sure if i actually made that clear. o.o

anyways, alex of the hurlnecklace site that i liked so much (to me i simply find it gorgeous. it's simplistic, yet feminine, doesn't roar of "i am a feminist" yet is ... ahhh) happened to drop by and commented. hehe. makes me feel all so weird for not commenting on her blog. yet that's just me. i don't like to comment too much.

many times, i view someone's website, words, sayings, i feel like commenting, telling them "hey, this is all so wrong" or "you should have done it this way" or "i feel sorry for you" and hope they would take what i said. but many times i stopped myself because i know, i can't understand how a person feel in their situations, because i know i haven't been in that situation before, and all i could provide was really just a listening ear and a comforting shoulder.

in the case of blogosphere, there's no way i can provide the shoulder, but i could just read and "listen".

and if i do agree with whatever so and so had said on their blog, it would seem weird to comment the very same that they had mention in their post anyways. so no comments are needed.

granted though, my own friends get a little upset when i don't comment on their blogs, or even tag them. first off, i don't really like tags. u notice how i don't have one on my own blog. i just don't think my diary is a chatroom. secondly, i am more likely to get spammed by funny people, and i dont feel like having to censor them or something, easier to prevent these buggers by not having a tagboard at all.

but i like comments, and i know my friends do. i do try and leave comments on their blogs as much as i can push myself to, but if i don't see a need, i don't really want to. :( man i m so mean.

While reading today though, i noticed something that was often my focal point of attention in the last few months while studying genocide cases worldwide.

Darfur, the place where for the last few months was basically a scene for genocide, was what some people might call, a repeated scene from 10 years ago, aka, Rwanda.

The horrors of genocide, where millions of people are killed for their beliefs, their race or just something that groups them up as one, cannot be told in simply words alone.

The united nations themselves set up many calls of "never again" along with their policies in the hope of stopping future genocidal cases, that the world may "never again" reel at the horrors of tyrants killing off millions of people with reasons that are racial or otherwise.

In this article, Kofi Annan expressed regret about how much more he could have done for rwanda 10 years ago, and how the international community was guilty of failing rwanda.

10 years on now, dear sir, and we have failed darfur too, don't you think? the slow response, the unwillingness to stop attacks just so that the other side of the country would have peace from civil wars. both are equally important, both had slow reactions from the international community. are we sure that those people who head the UN cares about the international community?

are we sure that the UN cares for world's poverty? are we sure that the United Nations is truly for the better good, or just another red tape to go through that would slow the processes to get aid for those who really need it?

While Kofi Annan can criticise the international community for slow reaction, the UN, while not supposedly as powerful as it sounds, can still urge and prod the leaders more. the number of news articles about what's happening in darfur though, seems more than the number of articles talking about the appeals at the UN. by a large number.

maybe we don't know what's happening behind closed doors, maybe we as the public don't deserve all that knowledge and do not understand political needs, wants and obstacles that politicians encounter.

but we do know that massive amount of deaths mean something. that's why there are non-profit organisations, that aren't part of the UN.

tell me, why the slow reactions... why the deaths. why?


Song i am listening to : Mariah Carey - We Belong Together
Mood : overslept


Well.. my little nap turned into a long one. i guess i was really tired out. Can't be help then.

before i slept though, i called up Crazy John's about my phone, but now they gave me an eta of my phone on either tuesday or wednesday. I know i left my number with them, and if they had changed the eta they should call and if they don't, i should have wailed at them. However, they have been extremely nice to me since the time i asked them for help, as compared to the vodaphone customer service that i called, who promptly just told me that it can't be done.

unless i bring it back to the Service Provider that i bought it from, aka, T Mobile USA. great, i spend another like 200 bux so i can use it on YOUR network? ur mad. and stupid. and bad customer service. but whatever....

well, and i promised an announcement.

remember a few days ago, i was talking about my own webhost, my own domain and what not? Jake and i have finally decided to take up on ace-net's offer, 5 gig space and 100 gig bandwidth. there's another one with a 4 gig space and 100 gig bandwidth by bluehost. i guess we got excited anyways, and just wanted something big enough for both of us to have our blogs hosted on there, and perhaps a forum as well (well that came later in our minds when we discovered the forum capabilities :P). i still don't know why we need forums!

it has wordpressed installed, so saves us the decision of movable type or wordpress, or just use as ftp to blogger.

this means basically, i am moving my blog. i know i know, i said i won't move, but this is too delicious to resist :P, and wordpress is so much more customisable than blogger as a whole. i kinda like that. although i have 0 idea how to customise it (welcome to boyfriend tech support, how may i help you?), it means i can LEARN something about everything else anyways. maybe, from then on, my entire blog might be all techie talk!

oh noes... i am turning into a nerd/geek/tech support!! help...

but yes, this blog will be moving. just probably need a few days or something, while both of us figure out how to work it, tweak it, personalise it, then move both our blogs. the address is similar, just this time in english, rather than faux german, seeing how i have misspelt it...

wasn't my fault though! dictionary's!

once everything is up and going, and i have moved my entire blogger content there, i will set up a redirection thing for u guys for a while, till i am sure most of you have updated your links.

and i am using firefox browser!!! the only thing i like so much about firefox, is the multi tabs. i am sick of ie bundling up into 10 windows while i am doing research and what not. its kinda hard to scan thru the multiple window tab thing when its piled up like that, i rather look left to right.

so many changes in one day... i feel exhausted. oh wait, i have slept 12 hours now.... hrm... what should i change next?!?!

oh wells... waiting to go breakfast at flirty gorgeous again. that place is addictive. that said though, i pretty much dont eat anything else for the rest of the day o.o. need to bake those damn cookies...


miyagi!??! what?

just a short post here before i nap... will add more later.

i did a trial run, just for the fun of it, on kenny sia's blog to see which singaporean blogger i resemble. i don't know about the general opinions of it, since you know, i don't stand infront of the mirror and ask myself what the hell am i like. but one line definitely is right... i make stupid words fit. new words out of old. oh wells. heres the result.

Congratulations Panda, you are...

Mr Miyagi of myveryownglob.blogspot.com

You are witty, and you know people from places. Those two qualities and others make you a very popular person among your peers, because they want to hear you dish out filthy backstage gossips. You also have a knack for inventing new words to suit yourself. You are a very loyal friend, and would jump into the ocean if your friend asked you to. And that's probably gonna happen if your friend gets too jealous of you getting all the girls/guys.

Which Singaporean Blogger Are You?

honestly.. i don't see myself growing a goatie soon, and i haven't read much of miyagi's blog to see the similarities. BUT... i am a strange person. so... yer.. whatever. :P he's a great writer in his own right, but we are 2 different people... funny though, this personality thing ahahaha...

i still prefer being orihime :X

will blog again later.. have some stuff to announce after all!


loud mornings

Song I am listening to: Jun Shibata - Maboroushi
Mood: freshly awaken

aside from the fact that i have few sleeps that i awake from feeling totally refreshed, i find that the more i want and, at times, need quiet mornings, it is often broken by the sounds of crazed toddlers with parents who either don't care how loud and disruptive their children are, or can't control their kids.

granted that kids being kids, they are often beyond the ability to sit still for more than 2 minutes, but small spaces, and parents who decides to have this "joyluck club" thing in a small cafe shud just be considerate to everyone, and also be very careful of their kids.

filthy gorgeous, this cafe that i have mentioned before, is one of those beautiful, tiny upper middle class cafe, with jazz music at night, that has wonderful wonderful cooks for such an outside-of-towns cafe. even their croissant tastes wonderful, really gorgeous melt in your mouth taste. the sad part was, somewhere in the past couple of weeks that i haven't turned up for breakfast, they decided that breakfasts should only be on weekends.

i guess for the manpower that they have ( i have seen this guy worked the entire day, from opening till closing) it's only feasible to be opened later, and with less hands, lest they tire out their employees.

so anyways, typical of my tradition, where i woke up early enough to have breakfast and could actually enjoy it, i took my grand little Berlin book out, to read while i was having my little breakfast.

when i saw the kids, i believe my first judgement was, awww so cute. i mean they did look so adorable. blonde ringlets, small stature. i don't think they were brothers, just circumstances (their mothers plus other mummies seemed to be some kind of mummies' unite club sitting there, enjoying the morning out too...) brought them together as friends.

then they started terrorising the place slowly. first they took out cars from this toy box near the kitchen door of the cafe, started howling at each other with their impressions of how various vehicles should sound.

then they started threatening their food.

"you want a piece of me huh!" *chomps food*

"don't you want a piece of me!!" *chomps another bit*

"yer i know you want a piece of me!!!!!" *swallows the last bit whole*

all through this, i was reading about how the Red Army was closing in on the Third Reich, cornering them land-wards, the only escape path was by sea, in a period towards the end of world war 2, after the Vistula attack.

somehow, that seems like appropriate action talk.

anyways, as i continued reading about how Hitler refused to face up to the reality, but on the subconcious side, he knew how he was losing the war and his people, the children started activating the "aeroplanes" mode. something that i used to do as a kid too.

each grab their favourite vehicle, and started flying them around the cafe, round and round me, the counter i was behind, and the spot near their parents, making huge box planes sound. at one stage, they decided that they are enemies, and started going in different directions, trying to catch each other. this got really loud though, and since i was sitting directly beside a pillar, the sound reverbrated right into my ears, loud, and annoying.

Things took a change though, as i read through how Hitler made Himmler the Commander-in-chief of the new Vistula army, a total inept at fighting strategies. i was a little absorbed into the story at this point to really try and care about the kids, but they invited their friend, possibly their own, a black labrador outside of the cafe, right into the cafe. then they cornered him into the back of the shop, the exit leading to the toilets, going, "dog dog dog!!"

cornered animals make hasty decisions. i don't know if the dog was their own, a friend's or a friendly. the fact was, the dog might get anxious at being cornered, and might end up biting them, a tragic end indeed, to my stay at the cafe. so i started watching them carefully, to ensure they do not get bitten or anything.

they got rescued by their mums and the waitress who got worried about the dog being in the cafe.

children though, have many creative means to keep themselves occupied, however the situation. so they went back to their aeroplanes zooming all over the place, while i went back to my book on how Hitler's higher ranking staff were starting to be bitches to each other, trying to ensure their spots as the Fuhrer's next in line.

then the kids caught sight of the laptop the shop owner had left running. i started watching them again. they got bemused by the screensaver, shouting "storm!!! storm!!"

"i see fishes"

"ooo nice storm"

see if they had click the buttons, the company's whatever might be deleted and what not. luckily, one of the mum's caught them in time again.

damn motherly instincts.

but as i read on about the bitchings within the Reich, the 2 boys started soft pummeling each other. i said soft pummeling coz they were slow punches, didn't hit hard either, was one of those soft, kneading motions that kids do. when each one had decidedly made the other kiss the floor long enough, the "winning" one will shout "yes i got you!!!"

somehow, that reminded me of the SS officers.

i decided that with the noise, and action, while they goes perfectly well with the book, its a little too noisy for my comfort. noise reverbrating through my head every second is more than i can take, when i wanted a quiet spot to read. so off i went home, yellings and moanings still reverbrating through my head.


they reflect adults at their basest.

while kids are still growing up and learning, sometimes adults have no excuses other than being crudely competitive at the worst of times.


Song I am listening to : Evan and Jaron - The Distance
Mood : slightly annoyed

before i go full on into this post, i must set this record straight, about this blog, about the pictures here, about what i write.

a long time ago, i mentioned, this is my personal space. while i admit to it being public due to the fact that internet is not such a secret place, and i don't like passwording shit, there are some lines drawn here. i have allowed people to add me on gmail, led you through little blips of my life, personal or otherwise, expecting you to at least read what i wrote, not to simply jump to conclusions.

of course, there will always be oddballs that will do otherwise. i don't normally care, albeit i will still be a bit pissed, but i don't really care generally.

since my dream post a few days ago though, i have been sent emails, and a few has communicated to me, via some means, and others to my friends exactly what they think.

let me clarify something here. this is MY blog, you do not go to my friends and bitch to them as if they are at fault if they publicise my blog's link anywhere.

if you see something good, you share it with your friends, no?

i thought as friends, we all understand each other. pardon me then, if i am wrong, but since I wrote this, I hold all rights to this, not anyone else. you don't have the right to be angry with anyone else.

a few nights ago, i mentioned a dream i had, it was A DREAM. it wasn't something made up to pissed anyone off, to degrade anyone or to condescend anyone.

i don't do such things. i would pay you out as a friend infront of everyone yes, but i won't belittle you so that you had feel like shit. hell no... but i had pay you out as you would pay me out as a friend. if you don't like it, tell me, I OWN THIS BLOG, THEREFORE ONLY I CAN REMOVE IT.

secondly, it being a dream, funny at some stage, weird at another, scary on another plane, but still a dream, something my mind can't control coz i am asleep. oh, pull all your stupid psychology stories all over me, but i am afraid even when i am awake, i let my imagination run away, i don't control it because imagination is one of the most beautiful thing one can have.

if you like to be a nazi, by all means. but go bring it somewhere else.

there is nothing wrong with me writing out what my dream went. if i could, i would have recorded all my random dreams on this blog, but most times, by the time i am out of my drowsy state, i can't remember jackshit. there were talking sheeps in one, my dad dying in another, me running from guys chasing me in a piazza like place whatever that i can't run out of.

there are so many dreams i can remember bits and pieces of, others i can't, and i note it here because THIS IS MY BLOG.

you, who reads this, were mostly invited here coz I PERSONALLY LINKED YOU.

while it's not the most serious of blogs, nor intended to be so, remember to use some form of brains. if you're going to look at this blog, for any particular reason, before accussing me of anything, READ THE FUCKING POST about it.

i hope i don't have to say this again. i believe everyone is intelligent enough to understand blogs are mostly words. pictures alone sometimes don't say everything. this isn't a photoblog. you want a photoblog, there's flickr to start with. in this blog, my words means more than my pictures, and generally, my pictures holds no meanings, no alliteration, nothing. it's just there to support my words at the most.

and if anyone hurts my friends, even if you're a friend too, i will kill you. maybe not literally, i will still kill you, slowly, emotionally. because if you're stupid, and hurt someone coz of your stupidity, you quite deserve to die torturously.

again, READ MY POSTS before making judgements on the pictures.

if you want me to clear the air on that post... this was the start of that post, before i shoved in wadge's picture:

"anyways, while i was napping, i had that weird dream again.."

in no way did i mention wadge looks like a kitten.

this has nothing to do with what rosie, wadge and yvette posted in comments, but i think everyone should mull over it, sit back, take a coffee, breathe in and think. let me do the equation for you.

Weird dream.

Wade looks like a kitten.

a doesnt = b.

ok... get it?

good. we can learn to get along after all.

tonight, we went for movies with para, andoo and linxy. rosie seemed sick, and i guess, that was a fortunate thing. the movie was the shits.

i won't say its bad acting, there were lots of raw emotions put in, real dark movie, and at times, bad humour, but oh wells. it was all wasted.

i am going to do a spoiler this time around, because this is pretty much what they did the entire movie, in my opinion.

the aliens were everywhere after like the first 10 mins or more of the movie, everywhere they go, people were grabbed or blasted to death, although the blasting reminded me of cremation since the heat was so hot, the people turned to ashes on the spot.

now imagine that, and everyone running, in the entire movie, just running and running, and tom cruise managed to dodge every single one of those blasts, every time the mobs swipe at them, be it in a house, out in the open, he NEVER DIESS NEVER GETS HIT NEVER EVER ANYTHING... except when he deliberately wanted to get caught so he can find his daughter, and voila... he manages to kill the alien, who spouted blood like diarrhoea.

you know those explosives ones you get after getting food poisoning? yer... like that... kawoosh... out from the back, 25 miles from the air down to earth.

alot of things in the movie wasn't explained well, like where the mobs come from, why they wanted earth dead and how they die. takes abit of listening to, if u really wana find out. others just weren't explained at all.

and goddamn the kid screams so much i wana just throw my chair at her.

the only thing good about the movie?

the aliens looked sooo cute.. sooo cute.... sssoooooo huggable.

other than that... blah...

should have napped.