hi~ beautiful sunday isn't it?

Going to church is like going home for me. all at the same time, it's calming, soothing, learning, and curing... everything. sitting there in the pews, having this one on one with God ur maker, it's something that everyone takes for granted when they go church but it's awe-inspiring in many ways.

anyways, was just reading an article in time just now, about how cases of bullying are escalating, particularly in europe. In one particular case, there was also this kid who commited suicide because he couldn't bring himself back to school to face the potential of being bullied again after the parents had a talk with the bullies' parents.

Children can be so cruel. Then again, as i have mentioned earlier, so can everyone be. However, how perverse is our society these days, to breed teenagers as such that they had force another fellow human being into a corner, that death seems better than life? Teenagers who had take nude or compromising pictures of their peers and threaten to circulate them on the internet such that they wouldn't have the will to face the world again. emotional threats that can be scarring. who taught it to them? who allowed such teachings?

As a child grow and learns, everything that they know, do and perform are emulations of what they had seen and been taught. what kind of education are we providing to our young today that makes it all right for them to do such acts and not feel anything but that "it's ok to do it coz he/she deserves to be bullied that way"?

in this world that we live in, this era, we all talk about civilisation, which comes with the knowledge that we have accumulated over the ages, the technology that we have created from nothingness, democracy and freedom, but each of these things does not seem to be part of what is happening to us. are we losing our morales with civilisation? with technology? this technology allowed such threats to be carried out on a massive scale, this civilisation, democracy, freedom, economy, allows such acts to go un noticed because everyone is too busy to "make it better" out there.

what happened to "every little thing starts from home"?

do you know what your child is doing today? do you know your child well enough? do u know what they need, and what they want?

everyone claims to know what need is and what want is. but answering that question with "sure i know what they need, they have too much time on hand which means they need a wiser way to spend it. which means they need more extra curricular classes.." isn't a need being curbed. some of these are cries out for attention, love, more time with the people who brought them here to live a life.

i am not saying i am a professional about children, nor that i know what children really thinks. everyone is different, everyone works differently. but i am only 23, it wasn't so long ago that i was but a child. i can still remember what i wanted and what i needed. most importantly, what i wanted from everyone was recognition. the recognition that i exist, that i am loved and wanted.

half the time i couldn't fit in with my peers because i was so different. i had rather spend my days reading books and more books than go out and play. people eat during breaks, i be holed up reading a book. eventually i had no real friends in primary school. people think i am weird, students and teachers alike made used of me because i had be naive enough to do what they want me to do. but i did wanted to fit in, i made an effort to by trying to talk about the same stuff. but i wasn't an uber hyperactive sort nor do i look uber adorable to be loved by everyone, or intellectual to draw teachers' attention.

resorting to not doing my homework did draw their attention though, and being late on a daily basis. negative attention was better than none. having the entire class not talk to me though, because the teacher said they couldn't till i start doing my homework hurt though.

what hurts most was when a teacher turns to you and say "you think mrs sim actually likes you to want to change you? she couldn't stand you which is why you're in my class this year...you deserved to fail.." words makes impressions on 12 years olds. they can make them jubilant or scar them permanently, and teachers, the ones who makes the most impressions of them all in their learning lives, can make a difference to the children they come in contact with.

rather than reach out to hurt a child, sometimes being encouraging, being supportive, and just trying to be their friend would make it easier for them to grow up right. they don't ask to be here, parents brought them here. while later on they have a choice of how they want their life to turn out to be, from the start, it is the parents that they have, the adults that they meet and the teachers who teach them what in life is important, what in life should be right that gives them the gift, the ability to choose what is right.

it is not the easiest job on earth, but neither is life. one wrong step, one wrong word, you who did it, who said it, could be the one that leads this child down the path to be a bully, to want to bully, to want to hurt to gain happiness for himself. the saddest truth is,

you won't even realise it is you who truly is the bully.